How to Design Your Own Boxer Shorts

As more and more websites offer the facility to design the artwork to be reproduced on men's boxer shorts so do the number of men with ridiculous and embarrassing designs on their undergarments increase. This article is for them and the tips will be timely for those who want to design their own boxers but who do not want to be among their number... because they are (and there is no nice way of putting this so I'll come straight out with it - apart from this preamble) LOSERS!

Another Problem we can Blame on the Internet

Online computer design technology means that the general public (as opposed to a vastly overpaid designer) can design motifs, images and write the copy to be reproduced on all sorts of merchandise. From T shirts to teddy bears and from place mats to boxer shorts, men can impose their own messages, styles and jokes on these and other items. Below the picture of old style boxers, what they looked like before their reincarnation, and the picture of the foundation garment as seen nowadays - the blank canvas upon which we embellish our designs as it were - are a few tips for you if you plan to be amongst the vast number of men who strut their stuff in self designed boxer shorts.

This ghastly image is courtesy of Wikipedia  - Boxer shorts from the old loose dangley days...

Thank Gauld for re designs and images from Wikipedia Commons!

Wilma's Tips for the Self Design of Boxer Shorts
Keep it Simple
Do not make your design too intricate as this will be too much for onlookers to take in. Keep messages short and to the point and limit your colour palette to two colours with a maximum of three. Remember, you are designing pants not a ceiling for a Rococo palace!

Do Not Personalise
Boxers declaring that the "property contained herein belongs to Candice-Marie "(or the name of an another individual) might be an expensive mistake. Once Candice-Marie (or the person whoever named) has packed the owner in (i.e. finished with him) these boxers become obsolete. The material they are made of are rarely good enough to be cut up for dusters and, anyway, who would want to be reminded of a failed relationship when cleaning?

Failing to Live Up to Expectations - Avoid this Scenario
Although size is unimportant, the depiction of a huge snake or massive one eyed monster on your boxers will have that special person expecting something enormous. Failing to live up to these expectations might cause upset.

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  1. that wholesome packet in the white undies looks suspiciously like it's been stuffed with socks or some other lumpy filler. Definitely not the full potato! that one

  2. Is that you Burt? I'd recognize that packet anywhere. So, you are having an affair with Wilma Proops - how low can you sink

    1. Doris, what can I say? You can have him back now...


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